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Six holiday stress busters | Column


Nov 28 2008

By Catherine Kendall

For the Reporter

I remember quite well my first Christmas in Sammamish (then unincorporated King County) in 1989. Just after decorating our house in High Country with lights, the snow started falling. It snowed heavily and the beauty of the Pacific Northwest took our breath away.

We were snowed in for a several days, and it was impossible to rush out and shop. The children made snowmen and sledded in our back yard. We met new neighbors, drank eggnog and spent a night walking through the neighborhood caroling. It was a wonderful, simple time. And it felt stress free.

Today I see many young families struggling to eke out of their already stressful life, a celebration of the holidays. This year, the challenges faced are amped up in a climate of financial uncertainty.

Common holiday stresses :

• Enough money. Perhaps you face an uncertain future in your job, or you are worried about making the winter mortgage payments and heating bills. Adding debt to a home equity line or credit cards is less an option for most this year.

• Feeling disconnected from others You may be far away from family and friends. A personal loss like divorce, the death of a loved one, or unemployment has touched you.

• Memories of past holidays: Memories of the past can intrude on the holiday emotions of today.

• There is just too much for one person to do

Take a deep breath. Here are the stress busters:

Plan to celebrate in inexpensive ways. You can’t buy happiness, nor should you be faced with a stack of bills after the holiday. Set a budget before you go shopping and stick to it. Eat at home rather than a restaurant, change a social dinner to a pot luck, and pare down on holiday decorations.

If you are spiritual, worship. For many this is the crux of the meaning of the holidays. So however you worship, whether you go to a church, a temple, a mosque, or simply stand beneath the star filled night sky, remember to honor your beliefs and tolerate those of others.

Pay it forward. So despite your best intentions, your holiday is not sizing up to be what you had hoped for. Perhaps you might try creating joy for someone else. Reach out to a new neighbor. If your child normally takes the bus to school, surprise them with a car ride to the front doorsteps. Volunteer at a local food bank. It is amazing how compassionate participation in the lives of others can warm our hearts.

Stay positive and be mindful of healthy habits. If you exercise, continue to, if you don’t try a daily walk outside for 20 minutes. Keep your diet healthy and be careful not to overindulge.

Learn meditation or another relaxation technique. Lastly, if you are struggling with overwhelming sadness, depression, anxiety or worry, consider getting additional tips and support from a counselor.

Catherine Kendall, LICSW is the Director and Founder of Sammamish Counseling, LLC serving Sammamish and the surrounding areas since 1998. Reach her at 391-7870 or at Catherine@sammamishcounsleing.com.

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